Led Into the Wilderness to…Live, Part 1

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Led Into the Wilderness to…Live, Part 1

After a year of prolific writing and the exhilarating experience of being vaulted into Amazon and Barnes & with my first book, the well went dry.  All the excitement faded, and so did my ability to write.   I felt like someone who experiences the tremendous outpouring of love and attention when the passing of their beloved leaves them bereft, then gradually everyone goes home, leaving only the presence of pain.  Welcome to the wilderness, where solace doesn’t live and no one delivers casseroles.  

Writing has always been my strength and a source of great comfort.  I feel alive when the words flow and I know God is my co-author in creative celebration, even when the topic is sad.   But now…

 I didn’t feel my Muse was dead, but dormant, yet I couldn’t get her to wake up.  Depression moved into my soul, and it seemed like my cries for help were bouncing off the ceiling, because God did nothing to relieve my anguish.  I felt abandoned by the only One who could restore my gift and set me free again.

 Then God sent Jeremiah to me with a Biblegram.  In Lamentations 3, Jeremiah tells of the time when God drove him into the dark, then walled him in with pain for a roommate and locked the door so he couldn’t escape.  The Lord had called Jeremiah to be a prophet, and he had been a faithful servant, even though everything he said made people angry.  He was persecuted his whole career, but God had been his strength…until now.  Apparently even God had rejected him, and he lost his hope.  But not all of it.

 The evidence indicated that God wasn’t listening, because he got no response, but Jeremiah prayed anyway.  Just in case.  “Oh Lord, remember my affliction and misery” (vs. 4).  An interesting thing happened next:  Jeremiah remembered all his past experience with God, who had always been loving and merciful to him.  It didn’t explain his current situation, but it restored his hope.  Something important was going on; Jeremiah just didn’t know what it was, but he became willing to listen.  God’s answer was unpleasant, to be revealed in Part 2 of this article.


About the Author:

I never have found a box that fits me, so I follow Jesus into the wild. My husband, Bud, and I are two life-long hippies, parents of four grown children, and live in Bartlett, TN, with six cats, two dogs, and no TV. I am a voracious reader and am passionate about prison ministry. I am also an advocate for middle-aged and senior women, and anyone who suffers from depression.

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